Sunday, October 23, 2005

What do I do well?

I have been getting so much spam email lately, grrrr! I have much better things to do with my time than delete those. It's just annoying and invasive.

I've been thinking about what I do really well. Well, I don't know. I do a lot of things ok but I can't think of anything I'm excellent at. Judging by Sami's recent behaviour, I'm not even a good Mother. Which is something I've wanted to do my entire life.

I've done a lot of things in my life. I've pursued many dreams and lived them. I've set goals and made them happen. I've climbed mountains and overcome fears (literally). Maybe being somewhat of a loner most of my life has given me this inner strength to live my own life. Maybe that's what I do well - live MY life.

So what do I still want to do? I do love being a Mama, even though it's the hardest thing I've ever done, it's also the most wonderful. I want to travel more. My long-term goal is to own and operate a holistic health retreat on the east coast of Australia. This vision has been coming to me since I was in my mid-20's. "Free Spirit Retreat" has been it's name for the last couple of years. Before that I just referred to it as "the natural health retreat thingy in my head". The vision gets clearer but the time is not right yet. Maybe not for another 10 years. We have to make a boatload of money first to bring it together. And the kids need to be older. And I need to research the energy-efficient, environmentally-friendly buildings etc that will be on the large property. I get so excited thinking about it and I could type here for an hour with some of the ideas I have for it. But I know that the kids will be up soon and Sami will start with her usual "what are we going to do today?"

We have some ideas of how to make a lot more money, but I really need that maid and chef so I have time to work towards that. They could be fun as well as profitable. I've thought about teaching fitness again too. But the money wouldn't be great, it would be more just because I enjoy it. Not the fast-paced aerobic classes anymore though, but a more gentle stretch-and-tone / tai chi / yoga type class. But I really have to get myself back into shape first. And I'm getting there. Not as fast as I would like, but I'm being gentle with myself and it is happening.

It's going to be a wonderful day!

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