Sunday, December 28, 2014

Being love...

The recent shift that I experienced a month ago has stayed with me.  I've had a stress-free December.  Life has been flowing calmly and joyfully.  Two birthdays, a road trip and Christmas all within 22 days.  I've maintained a connection with Love and have been filled with ongoing Joy and Gratitude.

I have a "big" birthday coming up next year.  Several people have asked me what I'm going to do to mark the occasion.  I don't want a party.  I have thought of maybe going on a retreat by myself for a few days.

I was thinking of what else I could do that might be fitting.  I thought about getting a tattoo...nothing big or flashy, just something simple, like the word "love" on my wrist.  Something that I would see regularly to remind myself of who I really am and what my purpose is.  Something like this:

or maybe this..

I really like this one, but it's just too big for what I was thinking:

So I was talking to Cary (who can't stand tattoos on most people, particularly females), and he asked me why I felt the need to do that.  I explained that I felt it would help undo some old conditioning and it would always be there to remind me of The most important 'thing' in every single situation, and what I want to be expressing and radiating at all times.  And reminding myself of what my essence really is.  That the petty, ego things around me, are not worth getting upset about, and leading to a deeper way of connecting with myself, others and life in general.

He asked me why couldn't I just BE that...why do I feel the need to put permanent ink on my "beautiful" body to remind myself of those things that I already know are inside of me?  Why can't I just pause and see the miracle that I already am?  Why don't I get a nice bangle or bracelet with "love" engraved onto it until I get to the point where I need no reminders, where I can just BE Love?

He would not have stopped me if I was hell-bent on getting the tat, but he asked me a question to get me to go deeper within myself.   At first, I was a little annoyed that he didn't just say "yeah what you want", but I see the wisdom in his question and I see that I do not need any 'thing' to remind me of my essence.  That maybe that 'thing' may even be a distraction and something that I relied on as a crutch so that I didn't need to step fully up to owning it, feeling it, knowing it deeply and living it all the time.  I need to stop making excuses and pretending that certain material things - even simple things - can give me the depth I am seeking.  That can only come from my heart.

I need to remember that everything that I do is (and can be even more so), an expression of love.  From taking care of myself and my family, interacting with others, all of it, ....every. single. moment.

And so it is.

Wednesday, December 03, 2014

Living Love...

I inhale love....

                  I exhale love....

.... just something I say to myself when I feel that I'm slipping into some old way of thinking.  When I'm out and about and the crowd or some other trigger has me wanting to go within and find a quiet space.  

I think I'm smiling more these days.  I know that I feel like I'm smiling inside of me more.

I am aligned with Love.

No grand displays, no major announcements, nothing flashy.  On the outside, it looks like nothing much has changed.  But oh, the delicious peace and lightness and freedom that I feel inside is just divine!

I'm finding that I'm much more aware of rote actions and thoughts that no longer serve me in Living As Love.  Petty judgements, reactions, random thoughts.  Sometimes they still appear, but they no longer feel good and they are soon replaced with a strong need to turn it around from a place of "What would Love do now?".  I get a feeling of how I would have preferred to act, and I put that feeling over the top of what just happened and aim to do it differently next time.  I'm learning.  And I'm being gentle with myself, because that's just how Love is!

I get excited doing things that would have triggered some anxiety or negative thinking in the past.  It's so wonderful to know that I can do it all's just a choice.  

Going into a crowded shopping mall, I am enjoying the music and the intention for Joy that it was created with.  I love watching shoppers choose gifts, thinking about people that they love (or at least like a bit).  

Underlying everything, I feel the steady warmth of Love.  I know that I am safe and secure,  and that's so good for my ego.  At the same time, my spirit feels free and light.  And happy.... so happy!

Joy to the world!!!

Pausing before I posted this, I had a scroll through my newsfeed on Facebook and found this, and I so agree with it:

Greater perhaps than the joy of being loved,
is the joy of loving.

Greater perhaps than the drama of seeking love, finding love and losing love,
is being love itself.
Nothing and nobody
can stop you from loving, from giving love,
from opening your heart wide,
from shining as brightly as the sun itself,
illuminating everything in your path.
Love is yours, forever and beyond time.
It cannot be taken.
It cannot be destroyed.
For it is who you are,
before you were named.
- Jeff Foster  (