Saturday, November 29, 2014

a touch of melancholy... and returning to Love

It's that time of the year again.

I am filled with memories and a little stuck on how to incorporate meaning into this most silly of all seasons.

I do not enjoy going to the shops, for the crowds of people and the Christmas music.  The music is what gets to me the most.  It's a strong connection to memories of my Dad, and to the 12.5 years I lived in the USA.  Over there, it was cold at Christmas, we had the fire going, we rugged up to go out at night to look at the Christmas lights around the neighbourhood.  It was like the Christmas that I had always seen in movies when I was in the hot Australian summer Christmas.  Yet, I always had an underlying homesickness.  Returning to Australia, I found that perhaps I had romanticized my memories.  Suddenly I was torn between two countries, slightly different traditions, vastly different climates, and the purpose of it all seemed always just out of reach.

Is this the year that I can find Peace with this season?

Today is Thanksgiving in the USA.  The first Thanksgiving that I experienced in the US was wonderful.  My new family there, having fun in the kitchen together to prepare special foods, enjoying feasting seemed so much like Christmas without the pressure and presents and drama.  Every other Thanksgiving continued that feeling, even if we weren't always with extended family.  Being back in Australia, our family still celebrates Thanksgiving with a special meal and simple pleasures.

As a mother, I feel a large responsibility to make special occasions, well...special.  Is that realistic?  When my older two were younger, I feel that I was much more creative, not just at holiday times, but all through the year.  Yeah, I'm kind of over that now and have been for a while.  It's okay, because that was what felt right at the time.  We've all changed.  Being creative was just one way of making the holidays special.  Food is another way and a nice way of connecting to the past through dishes that we only make for those occasions.  Fairy lights, holiday movies and decorating the home are other ways.

Every day feels special to me, some days I remember that more than others.  Sometimes it takes a day on the calendar such as today, to give me pause to remember.  Sometimes it takes hearing a song, seeing the sunrise, a look from a loved one.  And sometimes, it's just there, underlying every single thing that I do.

....two days later....

I've been pondering this a lot, and I think I've been looking at it all wrong!

I've been pondering a lot of things lately, well for a long time, but I keep circling back to one central theme.... Love.  And how to incorporate it into every single thing that I do.  I've accepted that it is my mission, my purpose is to Just Be Love.  I'm working on unraveling some old conditionings and looking at how I could act with Love ALL the time.  It's the 're-acting' that I'm finding to be an interesting trigger.

So I've decided to look at the holiday season from a place of Love.  Once I owned that, I felt a wonderful lightness take over.  I no longer feel responsible for creating a meaningful, magical Christmas for my children.  I know that as I do all that I do, with Love, then that ripples out and creates a calm and loving home.  With more fun and light.  When I feel Joy, it's much easier for the rest of the family to feel Joy as well.

As a family, we are talking about ways that we can give the Christmas season more meaning for us.  We are looking at ways that we can be of service to our wider community, not just by donating money, but doing things that involve our time, given with Love.  This is something that I would like to continue throughout the year, by regularly looking at new ways that we can do this.

I've designed a Love Meditation that I use every morning as I wake up, and every evening before I go to sleep.  Throughout the day, I use parts of it when I remember.  I'm creating new triggers that help me to return to living each moment with the essence of Love threaded throughout.

I'm no longer dreading going to the shops, or anything else that lies ahead in the coming month.  I'm absolutely looking forward to it all, and to creating beautiful new ways of Being throughout the holidays and other times.

... feeling so light and free in my heart...

In Joy!  xo

1 comment:

jacarandamum said...

I love this post, Annette - perfect timing for me - thank you!!!