I have been keeping so busy. I need to be busy right now as there is so much to do. It also helps me to only think about what needs to be done.
But then the quiet moments just before sleep come. Last night I was feeling grief over some of the things we are selling. Some of the kids things. We're taking as much as we can, and their attitude towards releasing things has been amazing. But we just cannot take some of the things that they have really enjoyed due to size or other reasons. I wonder if those things mean more to me as I see the potential for future enjoyment, as well as knowing how much they have liked certain things in the past, whereas they live more for now.
Also in those quiet moments, I do a wing check. I feel like I / we are taking a running leap off a mountain top. Some parts of our plan are as close to specific as we can get without actually being there - such as the area we want to live. My brother is giving us a car which is very nice of him and helps take care of that detail. I have a pretty good idea of what the kids and I will be doing. How will it all be different, and how will it still be the same. How will we change? Will it all be good? What will be compromised as I shake the stagnant compalcency from this life?
My wings are good, I'm ready to fly!
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