round and round..

A week ago there was a funeral for a 9 month old baby girl. A little girl that I had held and played with.

A few days ago we received news that Cary's brother has died, two months before his 60th birthday.

Cary and his brother spoke at least once a week on the phone. They enjoyed sharing opinions on the state of the world, finances and unique humour. So sad, and unexpected.

Cary will still leave here on Tuesday, but will fly to Indiana instead of Nevada. I wish we were all going so that I could be with him at this time. Thankfully though, he will meet his sister and stepdad there so he won't be alone.

When I heard about the baby, I felt incredibly sad. I wondered about the fairness in life. Cary's brother had at least had some time to live life though it still seemed too soon for him to go.

But then I was reminded of the incredible joy too. How looking at one extreme can give a much greater appreciation for the other side of the coin.

It is in touching the depths and feeling the darkness in life that we can really know and really live the highs and feel the lightness of Being that comes when we choose not to stay in those depths.

I am not saying to ignore the depths. I've been there and I can say that with every breakdown, there came a breakthrough. There is a purpose for everything, though at times, it is very hard to understand that. Gratitude for the things we do have helps to lift me up. I have found Trusting God to be a huge lesson too.

Although death, or any deep loss, can be painful, and a period of grief is necessary, it can also inspire us to live - really live each moment. To live our own lives fully and deeply. To love freely - ourselves and others. To speak our own truths with confidence. To not put things off. To live in joy.