Monday, December 31, 2007

31 Dec 07

At 11:30pm on this day, 14 years ago, my destiny completely turned around when I met Cary at a street party on the island in the Great Barrier Reef where I was living and he was enjoying a vacation. Wow, what a journey it has been. It just keeps getting better.

Speaking of journeys, this particular phase feels like it's coming to a new chapter.

The showers we were experiencing turned into a whole bunch of rain and high winds with a cyclone further up the coast. We did not feel comfortable going to the other side of the island and getting pounded on there as the cyclone came closer. Before we took the weather into account, we went to look at the other park and just did not get a good feel about it. It was supposed to be a 4 star park, but it sure didn't feel like that. It had a very old feel about it and just felt weird. I had a look in the ladies bathroom and with the way the tiles were, it looked like the floor was moving. The lady at reception was not very helpful and told us that we could not check in until 12 noon on the day that we were due to arrive, but she did not tell us that the office was closed from 12 - 1pm for her lunch. After pondering the weird feelings we got while we were there, and considering the coming bad weather, we decided to move slightly south west, about 12 km from the city of Brisbane to a 4.5 star park. We realised that a lot of Aussies like to go to the coast during the summer so we'd do the opposite and go to the city. We're going to check out the science center, planetarium and museums and other attractions of the big city.

Observations so far: yes, this is a nice park, but it also feels a bit sterile, or impersonal. People (generally speaking) seem more concerned with themselves and are just not as friendly and open. We visited a huge shopping mall nearby which was about the largest mall I've ever been to. It interesting to people watch the amazing melting pot of races and faces. Not many people looked happy as they rushed about, focused on their own lives. When driving here, I was excited to visit the big city, where I used to live, again. But driving here, getting lost after being given the wrong directions, looking at all of the traffic and just feeling the less friendly energy, I'm glad that we will be leaving in another 2 weeks. I plan on enjoying the time we have here, but I'm glad we know our departure date.

Sometimes, to figure out what we want, we need to experience the things that we do not want.

Packing up this caravan and setting up again several times recently has proven to us that we do not want to continue with this type of caravan. It is just too small. We've been questioning our purpose with this whole exercise. I feel we've learned a lot about simple living and enjoying life and the outdoors and each other. Travelling has been nice, but we are longing for a home base to know we can return to. We'd all like to go back to a house for a while. For some dry space during all the wet weather we've had, for individual privacy and just more personal space. Just a little house, on a large lot of land so we can still be outside a lot when it's nice weather. For a few months. Cary is returning to the USA mid Feb and will look into sending over a larger caravan (trailer) for us. We'd like to do a little more touring until we find "the" spot we want to be. We can imagine living in the caravan for a while as we look for some land to settle on and business opportunities to get into.

Interesting how when we think we're on the right track, another possibility comes to mind that needs exploring. In the process of evolving and creating who-we-really-are, we are paying more attention to our own feelings, intuitions and signs around us. We are waking up, becoming more aware, more connected to Source and each other.

We are looking forward to a calmer year ahead, filled with new adventures and amazing personal growth.

We wish you all a new year filled with good health, happiness and all the good things you wish for yourself.


Thursday, December 27, 2007

Dec 27 07

Australians love the great outdoors. Cary is amazed by the large number of campgrounds and how packed they all are at this time of the year. Family groups gather together and help with meals and the children after spending the day enjoying the simple pleasures of playing on the beach, going for walks and sitting around chatting while the kids play with cousins and new friends.

This new campground that we are at is a bit different from the last one. The other one had a beautiful pool, fabulous camp kitchen, kids playground, modern amenities and the sites were larger. This one is a lot more basic, but the people here are all so friendly. We are across the road from a river with lovely white sandy beaches. In a few days we're moving to the other side of the island and will be a block away from the surf beach. I thought I'd be glad to move, but I actually think I'll miss this quiet, close community. The kids have made a ton of new friends. On christmas, a lot of the other kids were given Nintendo DS's. In the afternoon, they discovered they could message each other. Sami and AJ took their DS's over and soon they were figuring out how far away they could all be and still get the messages. They just had a great time. They've also all been riding their scooters a lot around the park. They haven't missed having a playground and a pool here as they have found other things to do. The weather has been good, not hot, just really pleasant with some showers keeping things cool and fresh.

Our christmas was nice and simple. We went to my brother's houseboat for lunch and spent the afternoon playing on the beach and at the playground up the road. With all of the kids in the park, I did not hear any of them say to any others "what did you get?". They all just seemed to enjoy what they had and it was not a competition of who got the best stuff. Nice.

Even though we had a simple, stress-free, joyful christmas, there was something niggling at me that was missing. It seemed to lack depth. I think we can fill that next year by getting involved in some kind of community service project to help others.

Hope y'all are enjoying basking in the post-Christmas glow.

Saturday, December 22, 2007

lost: 2 rings. gone: attachment

Recently as I was going through some of the things I have in storage, I came across two rings of mine that I used to enjoy wearing. One is all silver and the other all turquoise. I don't like wearing a lot of jewelry on my hands & wrists, and currently wear some other rings I like, but I wanted to wear those so I put them on a leather cord to wear as a necklace. Yesterday as I was in the shower, the leather cord just fell off, with no rings on it.

The old me would have panicked and got the whole family out looking for them right away. However, my first thought this time was "oh well, it's just stuff, I hope whoever finds them enjoys them". It felt good to feel that. But then coming in behind that feeling was the thought "but it's MY stuff, and I have history attached to those rings" then came the feeling "so?". It was a comical interaction between my mind and my soul as my mind let go of the attachment to those two rings. I felt so ok with their disappearance that I just casually asked the family to keep their eyes out for them, but I did not send them all out combing the area. I trusted that if they were meant to return to me, they would and if they were meant for someone else, they would find their way to the right person.

This morning I had a brief vision of the turquoise ring and imagined it on my hand next to the other silver ring I'm wearing at the moment. About 20 minutes later, I found that ring.

This year has been such a big one for me in terms of letting go - of conditionings and material things - and personal growth in ways far beyond what I ever thought. It's been a tough year, but oh, so worth it.

Friday, December 21, 2007

Christmas Joy

Photo taken at South West Rocks, NSW. 17 Dec 2007

We are packing up our camper to prepare for an early morning get away tomorrow. It's amazing how relaxed we are. Life has continued to flow beautifully here. With the shopping centers jam packed, we always manage to get a spot right near the front. Not that we have been spending much time there, but when we do go, it's been a pleasure and we've been able to do what we need to do without stress. It's been so great!

Warm wishes to all our friends and family for a happy and joyful christmas!

Tuesday, December 18, 2007

Peaceful easy feeling

Ever since I started reading the 'Conversations With God' books, I've been feeling a beautiful, deep peace. The whole family picked up on that and we've had a lovely harmony here and a fantastic flow with life. Things that have been missing for months are 'suddenly' turning up, we've all been more playful and joyful and just loving living this free spirit life of ours.

Up until yesterday when I woke up tired after several nights in a row where my sleep had been interrupted quite a bit by noisy neighbours and Nuke wanting to nurse a lot more than usual. I was also starting to feel a bit tense about things we still had to take care of here before we go north and wondering when it will all get done with the social agenda we already have planned. It was a pretty windy day yesterday and that always bothers me too. So my agitation managed to rub off on the rest of the family. Interesting.

This morning I woke up feeling more rested, feeling my faith return that everything we need to do will get done and will be done with joy. As I write this, Sami and AJ are using their headphones to listen to a new Karaoke CD that Sami got for her birthday. They are singing together and dancing little toys all over Sami's bed. Cary and Nuke are still asleep. The birds are chirping and there is a gentle warm breeze blowing. That peaceful calm is filling me again.

Just before Sami's birthday, we went to a kinesiologist who, after getting Sami's body in balance then tested her to see how she processes various foods. For many years I've suspected she's had something going on in that department but I hadn't been able to find the right person to assist us. Or the time just wasn't right. Recently, Sami started complaining much more often of a sore tummy. She also started saying that her brain is "all fuzzy" and she's "thinking all crooked". So, it turns out she is intolerant to wheat, gluten, high fat and refined sugar. Which means that her body just does not digest those things which is why they are stored on her physical body. She's now ready to help herself more and is interested in getting a clearer brain and wants to trim down a bit. She knows that she needs to avoid those foods, but is in a transition phase of still wanting them for their familiarity and comfort. We're looking for alternatives and just bought a bread machine and are experimenting with new flours. She can have spelt so that's good and the spelt waffles I made on the weekend were very popular! I'm sorry that it took 10 years for us to realise this, but at least we now know.

Since Cary left for the USA up until a week or so ago, he has lost 25lbs. He was trying at first, being careful with what he ate, exercising regularly. Doing that he lost the first 15lbs. Then he just stopped focusing on it and just focused more on enjoying life and the family and the rest just seemed to melt off him. He's feeling more relaxed and connected and that's a wonderful gift for him and us.

Monday, December 10, 2007

a jolly time

A lot of people have told us lately how relaxed we look. Yeah, we're certainly in a pretty nice groove at the moment. Even this typically crazy time of the year is not bothering me like it has in the past. I'm just not doing as much about it. We're getting less presents for fewer people and the Christmas cards will either get done, or they won't.

It's Sami's birthday in two days. She has one more regular school day left, then another day of clean up and presentations and the last day is just a big picnic at a local creek/beach area. In two days our girl will turn 10 - no more single digits! For her birthday I got one of those flip over photo albums that holds 100 photos. I've chosen 10 photos from each year of her life so far. It was so much fun doing that. I think she'll enjoy looking through it and seeing some of the many people and places and fun times she's experienced.

We're all looking forward to moving on from here in 12 days time. I'm so calm about everything, it's the best present I could give to myself - and the rest of the family! It's good.

Wednesday, December 05, 2007


Several weeks ago, I was going in circles, knowing I needed to change some things, but not knowing exactly what. I was finally guided to ask for clarity....and it is coming.
My own goals, and our family goals are so much clearer. I am grateful.

It has kick started a new phase and given enthusiasm and energy to where we're at now.
We're having a major clean up in our camper. Really thinking about what we're taking with us when we head north. What do we need? What do we want? How much/how little can we be comfortable with? Already the space in our camper has a lighter feel as we take the excess books and games and toys and general stuff to our storage unit. Another garage sale this weekend - hopefully the last one for quite a while - will allow us to move our stuff into a much smaller storage unit.

Sami has another week of school before she finishes (again). She recently performed in her class play and absolutely shone. I must find drama classes for her when we head north. I'm excited to meet the other homeschoolers there. AJ's been enjoying gymnastics and they've both been swimming a lot. Nicholas speaks more words every day - all day every day that is...he starts chatting from the moment he gets up until he falls asleep. And his volume is loud! Oh boy is he a funny character.

I'm so blessed to have these three special souls in our family. Each of them shining in their own way. Teaching me so much, and in the process allowing me to shine too. With the love and support and encouragement from Cary too, I am very happy.

It was Cary's birthday on the 3rd. Sami made him a happy birthday card and she 'accidentally' wrote "have a God birthday" (instead of good birthday). We thought she had it right though.

I hope y'all are enjoying this month with peace and love and I wish you a God day.