Wednesday, June 30, 2010

a lesson for me...

We enjoyed the passes we had to the big amusement parks for the past few months. Well, towards the end, Cary and I were pretty much over it, and the kids seemed more interested in the gaming section than the rides. We were there last week and looking around at the different games. Most of the games are the kind that shoot out tickets after a game and the tickets can be traded in for prizes. The day that we were there, AJ saw a new machine that had prizes inside of it and the prize that he saw and wanted was a big rack of tickets! I said to him that I have never seen anyone win on those kind of machines, and I suggested that he play a different game, where I knew he would get about 40 tickets.

He would not be denied! He had his eye on that big ol' rack of tickets and he wanted it! He watched other people playing the machine and tried to see if there was any method to it. All you had to do was pull a lever and a wheel spun around until it got to a number. In three spins, you had to accrue enough points to get past a high number where you had the option to choose a little prize, or you could choose three more spins to get to a higher number and a larger prize. Cary gave the kids his last coin to play the game. They each took a turn pulling the lever and were able to get to the next level. So they took turns again...and WON the tickets!!! I received a lesson then in watching what I say...I always go along with the big dreams that AJ has, like his invention ideas...why didn't I support his smaller goal? After all, it's often with a series of smaller goals achieved that one has the confidence to go for the larger goals.

How many tickets were there? 1000! Well over the 40 he may have gotten on the 'safe' game.
Even though I was trying to avoid him being disappointed by not playing the risky machine, he proved to me that sometimes, you just have to take a gamble never know! And he is itself is a gamble and I have not always been the one to play by the rules and take the 'safe' path.

A funny little thing though...once he had the tickets, he had no idea of what he wanted to do with them. So the kids decided that as they had all contributed, they would just split them so they each got a variety of candy and novelties.

Monday, June 28, 2010

.. journey

A couple of weeks ago we hooked up our old video camera to the tv to watch some home movies. We saw Summer's 5th birthday (a few days before Nicholas turned that age), AJ's 2nd and 3rd birthdays and other times of the kids just playing. Watching my children's stages and growth had me thinking of my journey as a parent and the different stages of growth I've been through as well.

Attachment parenting was a natural choice when Summer was born, even though I didn't know it had specific, almost unspoken 'rules' about how to do it 'right'. When I found that out, I started doing more research into natural parenting. I started out parenting by instinct but lost some of that in trying to follow other people's guides. I read a lot - books, magazines, internet forums and websites - trying to find the right information. Some of it was helpful. A lot of it was time used up that could have been spent discussing ideas with Cary and seeing how they could work with our family. Instead, I armed myself with new ideas and then informed Cary of how it was going to be. Then I would be mad when he didn't see it that way too! I really have spent a lot of time reading about how other 'experts' suggest we live a simple and natural and connected life. I kind of wish now that I had just lived my own life.

We moved into Steiner homeschooling, to relaxed homeschooling, then to Life Learning /Unschooling. The deeper I go into Unschooling, the more I see how beautifully it ties in everything that has resonated with me along my lifelong Spiritual journey. The Power of Now, Law of Attraction, the Golden Rule, and just a desire to be a Mama who loves spending time with her kids and sees the value in every single thing about them. For most of my life I have believed that 'Everything I Need will be Provided'. It's always been so. It encourages me to allow that same Trust to operate in the lives of my children where I have at times had doubt.

Cary and I have had our ups and downs over the years but for the most part we coast along well. A few weeks ago, we had an argument that took me by surprise. I took some time out afterwards and asked for guidance to give me some insight into preventing that pattern. I realised that I have a different level of communication with my kids than I do with Cary. I have put so much into being a Mama that I have neglected being a Partner in a deep and meaningful way. And I confess here publicly that I listened better, and gave more respect to, my children. In reading the different parenting books and advice over the years, I didn't factor that I could, or maybe should, apply those aspects that resonated with me, to my relationship with my husband.

So here I am....letting go of any rules that are not mine...letting my instincts guide my choices....making respect for ALL (not just my kids, but Cary, myself and everyone I meet) a priority. My life continues to get richer and deeper! (My golly...what will another 10 or 20 years bring?!) I know there are more lessons for me in the area of living an authentic life of deep connection...I am aware of a subtle longing inside of me for..for..? I'm sitting with that and in the meantime, I am enjoying the joy of individual moments and when there is some quiet, I ponder the root of that ache.

Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Mr 5!

Look who turned 5 recently!

Cary arrived back from his trip to the usa one week before the big birthday. He was only gone one month this time.

We've had some beautiful warm sunny days lately, and some drizzly cool ones. I don't like any cool weather, but I am grateful for warm slippers and flanelette sheets! I know we are very lucky to live in the sub-tropics, but this time of year always has me longing for the full tropical weather!

Tuesday, June 01, 2010

Who shall I Be today?

We have the official start of Winter here today. The mornings and evenings are a little chilly, and the days are usually sunny. Even though we live in a sub-tropical area, I still don't like that little chill in the morning. I am such a wimp in any cool weather.

So this morning I was lying in my nice warm bed savouring the warmth and thinking "I don't want to get up". Then I reminded myself that I really don't "have" to. The kids had gotten up and were doing their own thing. There was no rush at all for me to get up. In fact, there was no thing I "had" to do. Lots of options of things I could "choose" to do though.

So I started the day thinking about the kind of me I wanted to "be" today...connected, playful and loving...and the decisions of what I do, will stem from that.

recent photos...

I've been meaning to post these pics for a while...finally getting around to it.

These first photos are from a morning bike ride we took, um a month ago, but anyway...I stopped to take a pic of the path itself next to the creek, then took a series of pics in stages looking from where the creek meets the ocean then the next stage along the creek until I had covered approx 180 degrees and was looking at the mountains behind me...

If I was really clever, I could probably put all of those photos together so you could get the full effect, but I'm not and I really don't want to figure that out as my daughter told me I already spend too much time on the computer! So next up...we rode another 30 seconds along the path and stopped along the breakwall (creek is on one side, beach on the other) ... We can't help but feel so blessed to live in this magical area!

Another day...Summer sunning herself:

The kids pulled all of the cushions off of the couch and made a big tower in the hallway. They would run and jump on it and push it over or climb up on it...kept them amused for at least an hour!

Nicholas just looking cute:

Nicholas and I sitting on the roller coaster carriage just before N's first ride on it! He was very excited and loved it!

Our three fantastic, amazing, wonderful, awesome children:

Nicholas with his biggest fan:

A few more photos while I'm on a roll...

We found this sign kind of funny:

Kids and a new friend at the Currumbin Wildlife Sanctuary:

Koala (awake - how rare!)

Koala asleep - that's usually how they are seen.

Kids on the spider web in the fantastic playground in the Sanctuary. I thought the spider hanging over them was a very cool addition:

The kangaroos there are very used to being handled. This is the most relaxed roo I've ever seen:

The boys chatting to an emu:

Kids and roo:

Double rainbow:

A kookaburra visited us as we were packing up after our local hs group last week. The boys were able to hand-feed it. Pretty tame for a wild bird!