I love it when the Universe confirms my direction with some kind of sign. In this case, it came after my recent ramblings on staying put in one place vs. moving around. I was at the library with the kids and a book caught my eye and drew me to it....it is called 'Raising Global Nomads' by Robin Pascoe.
Just as I had concluded, her advice on page 5, when she was talking to some teens at an international school in the UK about what she was going to tell their parents: "Make sure your children know you love them; make them feel safe; protect them without overprotecting them, so they can learn to stand on their own two feet." and, "despite all the moving around, they, as loving parents, are your true home and bedrock of support."
I admit to flicking around the book, not feeling the need to read the entire thing. I found this other gem on pg 204:
Travel writer, essayist, and global soul Pico Iyer has written that "global citizenship does not mean giving up a sense of roots so much as extending our sense of what roots involve." It is my belief that parents ground their children with roots made of love and respect. The family's values, beliefs, and traditions are like the branches of a tree; the enriched childhood produces colourful foliage. Some leaves may appear later than others, but that's fine, too. It takes a lot of trees to create a forest, just as so many unique cultures make up our world.
I know this, and it is very kind of the Universe to show me that I really am on the right path.
Showing posts with label travel. Show all posts
Showing posts with label travel. Show all posts
Monday, November 16, 2009
Friday, August 21, 2009
Letting go and Being at home
Twice in about 10 days I misplaced items of perceived value. One item was Nicholas’ bum bag with his DS and some games in it. The other item was the keys to my car in the US and my house in Australia. Both times I started to panic a little. With the first item, we were getting ready for our trip back east and I thought Nic would enjoy using his DS along the way. I searched for about an hour, with my energy tense, affecting the rest of the family who were trying to enjoy getting ready to go. When I finally just let go of having to find it…when I realised that if it was gone, we were still quite ok, and if someone else had found it, I hope that they enjoyed it…when I no longer felt any attachment to it…I decided to check the car one last time and, as if I was guided, found the bag right away.
With my keys - I was with the kids down on “the strip”. We had walked a long way and, together with the heat and the noise and the crowds, we did not feel like walking back to the car. So we caught the bus. When we sat down on the bus, I went to get my keys out of the backpack so that we could go straight to the car and get out of there. I could not find them. I have a little bell on my keys so that I can always find them by the jingle jangle sound. I searched every pocket. I started to panic and felt sick thinking about the inconvenience and cost and how long it might take standing in the heat waiting for a locksmith (it was the only key to the car - I couldn’t even call Cary to come and help us). Then the thought of how we would get into our house in Australia after traveling for 24 hours was not appealing either. I thought about backtracking to try and find the keys, but we had been to so many places and were frankly quite ‘done’. The backpack had been opened so many times to get water and snacks out, that the keys could have been in Venice, Paris, New York, (even though these were casinos, they could have well been in those actual places), or several other casinos or on the sidewalk along the way. Going back was quickly ruled out. In the space of about 4 minutes, I was able to turn myself around from feel sick, to feeling capable of dealing with whatever I had to. Again, I let go of my attachment to having to have the keys. And then again, I was guided to exactly where they had fallen down the back of the pack (I was sure I had checked there though!)
These were great lessons for me in non-attachment and also in mindfulness and staying aware. I think they helped me to prepare for the next level of detaching - leaving the USA. A place I used to live, but where I knew I was just a visitor this time. Quite an odd feeling. Will we be back? I don’t know. If so, I don’t know when or for how long and if we’d be living there or just visiting again.
We went to the USA with two suitcases and two carry-on bags, and returned with four suitcases, three smaller bags, and four carry-on bags. It took me a long time to pack it and then I looked at it and wondered what the heck was in there? It seemed excessive. We had acquired some extra clothes and shoes, and I bought things for the kids to use while we were here - books, toys, pencils and paper and colouring books, DVD’s, DS games etc. Not knowing if we were going back to the USA, we took most of it with us. And I also bought a few things for the house that are cheaper in the US - sheets and towel and some kitchen items. But for someone who loves simplicity, traveling with all of those bags did not feel simple.
Cary helped us check in at Las Vegas. Some of the bags were overweight so we reshuffled some stuff and he took some things back to the car to bring over when he comes. We had to collect all of our luggage in LA and take it to another terminal to check in for the international leg. I paid an airport worker to help me with that. It felt really strange to be leaving. Exciting and sad with a lot of uncertainty ahead. Constantly reminding myself to stay present and aware of each moment. Allowing myself to feel each emotion and explore it.
We all got a little bit of sleep on the plane ride over the Pacific Ocean and arrived in Brisbane to a crisp winter morning. I was told that the daytime temps lately have been in the mid to high 20’s C (82 F) . Lovely! We cleared immigration, got our bags easily (although Summer was having a huge meltdown after spending most of the flight watching movies and fighting sleep), and went through customs with no problem. We then caught a train to the Gold Coast and a maxi taxi to our house. The kids all fell asleep on the train and when I woke Nicholas to get off, he started screaming and crying, which he did not stop until we got to our house. It was nice to walk into our place but I was aware of a totally detached feeling. I opened up all of the windows to get some fresh air through the place - the air smelled so good! We checked our garden and I started a mental list of things to do out there.
Our cupboards were almost bare so the next thing to do was to get some food. Only the car wouldn’t start so I called the RACQ from a neighbours house as my cell phone was flat and had no credits anyway. (We don’t have a landline.) Got the car going and then took it for a run on the motorway for almost an hour to charge it up well. Got petrol and groceries and credit for the phone…but the phone doesn’t seem to be working yet. A little unpacking and an early night finished the day. We were going to go for a walk to the beach, but Summer fell asleep about 3pm and didn’t wake up until the next morning.
The kids, and I, all had moments of delight and surprise as we rediscovered things we had here that we had totally forgotten about. But if we had never come back to this house, they would have remained forgotten and that would have been ok too. When I left here 12 weeks ago, I felt attachment to this ‘stuff’. Traveling reminded me that it is not the things we have, it is Who We Are that is important. And in any moment, it is our connection to ourselves and others that is the only thing that matters.
I know that the kids will enjoy playing with the things they brought back with them from the USA, and it will help them to remember the time we had there.
Summer was very emotional yesterday after we returned. She enjoyed being able to have her own room again, but was overwhelmed by the things she has in there. She was crying and saying that she doesn’t know where “home” is, where she belongs. She has spent most of her life living in the USA, and three months there was long enough to feel like we were putting down roots there again. If it had just been one month, it would have felt like a vacation the whole time. We had time to visit with friends quite a bit and to connect, but then to leave was hard. She and I talked about this and I validated all her feelings. Then we spoke about not where we are, but WHO we are, and if we can be truly comfortable with that, then we will feel at home anywhere. Sure there are places we feel a stronger connection to something greater than us, but when we feel comfortable within ourselves, we can feel comfortable in any situation.
I looked around at the 'things' in this house and knew that any attachment I had felt, I no longer did. I had thought that I was ready to settle down, but now I'm thinking that I'm ready to keep traveling. Wherever I go though, I know I'll be Home.
With my keys - I was with the kids down on “the strip”. We had walked a long way and, together with the heat and the noise and the crowds, we did not feel like walking back to the car. So we caught the bus. When we sat down on the bus, I went to get my keys out of the backpack so that we could go straight to the car and get out of there. I could not find them. I have a little bell on my keys so that I can always find them by the jingle jangle sound. I searched every pocket. I started to panic and felt sick thinking about the inconvenience and cost and how long it might take standing in the heat waiting for a locksmith (it was the only key to the car - I couldn’t even call Cary to come and help us). Then the thought of how we would get into our house in Australia after traveling for 24 hours was not appealing either. I thought about backtracking to try and find the keys, but we had been to so many places and were frankly quite ‘done’. The backpack had been opened so many times to get water and snacks out, that the keys could have been in Venice, Paris, New York, (even though these were casinos, they could have well been in those actual places), or several other casinos or on the sidewalk along the way. Going back was quickly ruled out. In the space of about 4 minutes, I was able to turn myself around from feel sick, to feeling capable of dealing with whatever I had to. Again, I let go of my attachment to having to have the keys. And then again, I was guided to exactly where they had fallen down the back of the pack (I was sure I had checked there though!)
These were great lessons for me in non-attachment and also in mindfulness and staying aware. I think they helped me to prepare for the next level of detaching - leaving the USA. A place I used to live, but where I knew I was just a visitor this time. Quite an odd feeling. Will we be back? I don’t know. If so, I don’t know when or for how long and if we’d be living there or just visiting again.
We went to the USA with two suitcases and two carry-on bags, and returned with four suitcases, three smaller bags, and four carry-on bags. It took me a long time to pack it and then I looked at it and wondered what the heck was in there? It seemed excessive. We had acquired some extra clothes and shoes, and I bought things for the kids to use while we were here - books, toys, pencils and paper and colouring books, DVD’s, DS games etc. Not knowing if we were going back to the USA, we took most of it with us. And I also bought a few things for the house that are cheaper in the US - sheets and towel and some kitchen items. But for someone who loves simplicity, traveling with all of those bags did not feel simple.
Cary helped us check in at Las Vegas. Some of the bags were overweight so we reshuffled some stuff and he took some things back to the car to bring over when he comes. We had to collect all of our luggage in LA and take it to another terminal to check in for the international leg. I paid an airport worker to help me with that. It felt really strange to be leaving. Exciting and sad with a lot of uncertainty ahead. Constantly reminding myself to stay present and aware of each moment. Allowing myself to feel each emotion and explore it.
We all got a little bit of sleep on the plane ride over the Pacific Ocean and arrived in Brisbane to a crisp winter morning. I was told that the daytime temps lately have been in the mid to high 20’s C (82 F) . Lovely! We cleared immigration, got our bags easily (although Summer was having a huge meltdown after spending most of the flight watching movies and fighting sleep), and went through customs with no problem. We then caught a train to the Gold Coast and a maxi taxi to our house. The kids all fell asleep on the train and when I woke Nicholas to get off, he started screaming and crying, which he did not stop until we got to our house. It was nice to walk into our place but I was aware of a totally detached feeling. I opened up all of the windows to get some fresh air through the place - the air smelled so good! We checked our garden and I started a mental list of things to do out there.
Our cupboards were almost bare so the next thing to do was to get some food. Only the car wouldn’t start so I called the RACQ from a neighbours house as my cell phone was flat and had no credits anyway. (We don’t have a landline.) Got the car going and then took it for a run on the motorway for almost an hour to charge it up well. Got petrol and groceries and credit for the phone…but the phone doesn’t seem to be working yet. A little unpacking and an early night finished the day. We were going to go for a walk to the beach, but Summer fell asleep about 3pm and didn’t wake up until the next morning.
The kids, and I, all had moments of delight and surprise as we rediscovered things we had here that we had totally forgotten about. But if we had never come back to this house, they would have remained forgotten and that would have been ok too. When I left here 12 weeks ago, I felt attachment to this ‘stuff’. Traveling reminded me that it is not the things we have, it is Who We Are that is important. And in any moment, it is our connection to ourselves and others that is the only thing that matters.
I know that the kids will enjoy playing with the things they brought back with them from the USA, and it will help them to remember the time we had there.
Summer was very emotional yesterday after we returned. She enjoyed being able to have her own room again, but was overwhelmed by the things she has in there. She was crying and saying that she doesn’t know where “home” is, where she belongs. She has spent most of her life living in the USA, and three months there was long enough to feel like we were putting down roots there again. If it had just been one month, it would have felt like a vacation the whole time. We had time to visit with friends quite a bit and to connect, but then to leave was hard. She and I talked about this and I validated all her feelings. Then we spoke about not where we are, but WHO we are, and if we can be truly comfortable with that, then we will feel at home anywhere. Sure there are places we feel a stronger connection to something greater than us, but when we feel comfortable within ourselves, we can feel comfortable in any situation.
I looked around at the 'things' in this house and knew that any attachment I had felt, I no longer did. I had thought that I was ready to settle down, but now I'm thinking that I'm ready to keep traveling. Wherever I go though, I know I'll be Home.
Saturday, July 11, 2009
half way already!
We are already past the halfway mark in our trip here. I've surprised myself with how easy it was to drive here again. I thought that after 2.5 years away, I'd be wanting to drive on the left hand side of the road like we do in Australia. The first time I got behind a wheel here, I admit going a little slow and sticking to the right hand lane. After a few blocks, I breathed out and something clicked in and it all came back to me - even shortcuts and how to get to old favourite places.
Other things that we've gotten used to here again are light switches that go the other way; electrical power points that have no on/off switch; automatic flushing toilets and soap dispensers; the toilets themselves that are larger and lower here; the huge oven at the motel suite (but the oven is a standard size for here); and huge video billboards.
Are we moving back here? I just don't know.
Other things that we've gotten used to here again are light switches that go the other way; electrical power points that have no on/off switch; automatic flushing toilets and soap dispensers; the toilets themselves that are larger and lower here; the huge oven at the motel suite (but the oven is a standard size for here); and huge video billboards.
Are we moving back here? I just don't know.
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
Las Vegas Life Learning
We are in Las Vegas!
Five days before we left Australia, we drove through some heavy rain to my Mum's place, needing to take a couple of detours off the highway along the way due to flooding. Finally got there, celebrated Mum's 70th birthday and tried to get home the next day. The rain had not let up though and the highway was cut in at least 5 places. Even the nearest highway across the mountains was cut. So we drove south to Maitland, and turned inland and headed north up the New England Hwy. Nicholas had a fever and wanted me so my brother-in-law drove for me for a while. We were all headed towards Tamworth and my sister's place anyway. The big detour meant that I could stop in and see my Dad and StepMum for a little visit which was wonderful. Caught up on some hugs. The next day we drove up to Tenterfield and across the Bruxner Hwy to Bangalow (so pretty) and rejoined the Pacific Hwy. When driving up the inland road it was dry and a little brown. Such a contrast to the flooded coast.
We had one day to do all of our final prep for the big trip which included a house inspection and a 2 hour trip to the dentist for Summer and AJ. Everything got done, but I didn't get much sleep before leaving home at 6:30am to get the maxi taxi to the train, the train to the airport, the big plane to LA. As we were descending into LA, we went through the white puffy clouds which slowly turned to grey as we moved into the smog that just didn't lift. The only one that had slept was Nicholas as he still wasn't feeling so great. Everything had gone smoothly and we cleared immigration and customs easily. Walking out of the terminal, we found that LA was noisy, dirty and very smelly. So many security checkpoints along the way. I tried to get some change so I could call Cary and the shopkeeper I went to was very rude. Welcome to America! We didn't have to wait too long for our flight to Vegas but arrived there totally wrecked. Wonderful to see Cary but we went straight to our room and fell straight into bed for 3 hours. Went our for some groceries and dinner and then slept for 10 hours. It took several days to catch up but we're all good now.
We've been here two weeks already. I've been overwhelmed by the noise and crowds and shops and smells. I resisted the whole experience here for a while, but being with Cary and catching up with friends has made it really good. Really good. The kids fitted right back in at our old homeschooling group and I've had an absolutely lovely time hanging out with my friends and making new friends.
I realised that I was being very judgemental and decided to let go of that and just enjoy this for what it is, while it lasts.
The thing I've learned from this whole thing is that I have limits and I think I've gotten a whole lot better about recognising when I'm approaching those. I thought I was doing well, but the trip to Mum's on top of the trip here on top of very little sleep was all too much. So when the noise and the smells and the crowds get too much for me or my kids, I'm not going to try and push them or me. It's ok to say no or "we've got to go". It's ok to take time out and not "do" anything in particular. Maintaining my balance is my priority. With that, everything else flows.
Five days before we left Australia, we drove through some heavy rain to my Mum's place, needing to take a couple of detours off the highway along the way due to flooding. Finally got there, celebrated Mum's 70th birthday and tried to get home the next day. The rain had not let up though and the highway was cut in at least 5 places. Even the nearest highway across the mountains was cut. So we drove south to Maitland, and turned inland and headed north up the New England Hwy. Nicholas had a fever and wanted me so my brother-in-law drove for me for a while. We were all headed towards Tamworth and my sister's place anyway. The big detour meant that I could stop in and see my Dad and StepMum for a little visit which was wonderful. Caught up on some hugs. The next day we drove up to Tenterfield and across the Bruxner Hwy to Bangalow (so pretty) and rejoined the Pacific Hwy. When driving up the inland road it was dry and a little brown. Such a contrast to the flooded coast.
We had one day to do all of our final prep for the big trip which included a house inspection and a 2 hour trip to the dentist for Summer and AJ. Everything got done, but I didn't get much sleep before leaving home at 6:30am to get the maxi taxi to the train, the train to the airport, the big plane to LA. As we were descending into LA, we went through the white puffy clouds which slowly turned to grey as we moved into the smog that just didn't lift. The only one that had slept was Nicholas as he still wasn't feeling so great. Everything had gone smoothly and we cleared immigration and customs easily. Walking out of the terminal, we found that LA was noisy, dirty and very smelly. So many security checkpoints along the way. I tried to get some change so I could call Cary and the shopkeeper I went to was very rude. Welcome to America! We didn't have to wait too long for our flight to Vegas but arrived there totally wrecked. Wonderful to see Cary but we went straight to our room and fell straight into bed for 3 hours. Went our for some groceries and dinner and then slept for 10 hours. It took several days to catch up but we're all good now.
We've been here two weeks already. I've been overwhelmed by the noise and crowds and shops and smells. I resisted the whole experience here for a while, but being with Cary and catching up with friends has made it really good. Really good. The kids fitted right back in at our old homeschooling group and I've had an absolutely lovely time hanging out with my friends and making new friends.
I realised that I was being very judgemental and decided to let go of that and just enjoy this for what it is, while it lasts.
The thing I've learned from this whole thing is that I have limits and I think I've gotten a whole lot better about recognising when I'm approaching those. I thought I was doing well, but the trip to Mum's on top of the trip here on top of very little sleep was all too much. So when the noise and the smells and the crowds get too much for me or my kids, I'm not going to try and push them or me. It's ok to say no or "we've got to go". It's ok to take time out and not "do" anything in particular. Maintaining my balance is my priority. With that, everything else flows.
Monday, May 18, 2009
counting down...10...9...
Nine days until we leave for Vegas. Our internet will be cut off tomorrow so I'll post sometime after we get there.
Breathing deeply....
Breathing deeply....
Sunday, May 03, 2009
Lucky girl...
I love my home. I love our life here. Knowing that I'll be leaving it for 12 weeks has me appreciating it even more.
When I was in my teens and twenties, I thrived on adventure and drama and created a lot of both in my life. When I first left Australia to go to the USA, I was excited and care-free and thirsty for even more adventure. Even though I enjoyed it greatly, there was a little something missing and every trip back to Oz from the US had me excited because deep down, I knew I was going "home". I am deeply grateful for the 12.5 years I had in the USA, for our life as it was there, for our friends, and for the many, many lessons I learned.
In several weeks, I'll be leaving Oz to go and visit the people and places I'd been saying I missed. It will be really really good to see those people again. And I can tell, it will be really really good to come back home after that.
I feel so comfortable here, so content. I think I have finally "settled down". One more move to a little farm and some road trips within Australia will fill my life to overflow. I am so very lucky, so very blessed.
When I was in my teens and twenties, I thrived on adventure and drama and created a lot of both in my life. When I first left Australia to go to the USA, I was excited and care-free and thirsty for even more adventure. Even though I enjoyed it greatly, there was a little something missing and every trip back to Oz from the US had me excited because deep down, I knew I was going "home". I am deeply grateful for the 12.5 years I had in the USA, for our life as it was there, for our friends, and for the many, many lessons I learned.
In several weeks, I'll be leaving Oz to go and visit the people and places I'd been saying I missed. It will be really really good to see those people again. And I can tell, it will be really really good to come back home after that.
I feel so comfortable here, so content. I think I have finally "settled down". One more move to a little farm and some road trips within Australia will fill my life to overflow. I am so very lucky, so very blessed.
Sunday, October 12, 2008
chickenpox
AJ has the chickenpox at the moment. He had a slight fever Wednesday evening and Thursday afternoon we noticed some spots. Friday all day he just looked miserable and the itching bothered him as he tried to sleep that night. I put chickweed gel on the spots (approx 100 of them) when they were bothering him and that has helped a lot. He started looking a lot brighter Saturday afternoon and slept much better that night. Today is Sunday and he's bouncing all around the place. We did go for a bike ride to get him out of the house but we didn't stop at the playground or anywhere as he's still contagious. The other things we're doing for the 'pox are seeing that he drinks lots of water and he was also taking a daily bath with baking soda in it.
Summer had a very mild dose when she was 2 so I'm waiting to see if that was enough for her to build immunity to it. I'm also waiting to see if Nicholas gets it. It can take 10 - 21 days to show up so we'll see.
Cary's leaving on Tuesday morning to go back to the USA for about a month. I'm going to miss him a lot. I know he has to go though. While he's away, the kids and I are going to focus on some self-sufficiency projects like establishing a vege garden, making a solar oven, looking at our cupboards and shopping list to see what we can make ourselves, eg peanut butter and costing that out. I'm keeping my eye open for strawberries on sale and might even attempt to make jam this year.
Gotta go and get some extra hugs from my man before he goes :-(
Summer had a very mild dose when she was 2 so I'm waiting to see if that was enough for her to build immunity to it. I'm also waiting to see if Nicholas gets it. It can take 10 - 21 days to show up so we'll see.
Cary's leaving on Tuesday morning to go back to the USA for about a month. I'm going to miss him a lot. I know he has to go though. While he's away, the kids and I are going to focus on some self-sufficiency projects like establishing a vege garden, making a solar oven, looking at our cupboards and shopping list to see what we can make ourselves, eg peanut butter and costing that out. I'm keeping my eye open for strawberries on sale and might even attempt to make jam this year.
Gotta go and get some extra hugs from my man before he goes :-(
Sunday, September 02, 2007
Leaving on a jet plane...
I recently went through the bag of clothes that I had brought with me. I took out things that I don't love to wear, and things that just were not my favourites for whatever reason - the colour was just not quite the right shade or the fit was not what I really like. I was able to fit all of my clothes into a 50L plastic container. I will admit that I have a few things in storage that are just not practical to bring on this journey, like my knitted jumpers (sweaters), and some dressier types of clothes.
I sorted through the kids clothes too and now all of Sami's clothes fit into the same size container as mine, though somehow she always has more washing than the rest of us. Both boys clothes fit into one the same size as Sami's and mine. I had another 50L plastic container that had toys in it, but the kids are just not playing with them. They are so busy playing with friends and each other and on their scooters and with the birds, that they rarely look for anything else. So I took some toys back to the storage unit and put some others into a smaller container. It turns out that I needed the larger container to put the beach and bath towels in. We had just been leaving them out on a drying rack. They were drying during the day, but as the sun started going down, the afternoon sea spray would get on them and they would get damp. so now I put them away once they are dry.
I had a clever blog written in my head in the middle of the night last night, but now I can't remember any of it. Oh well.
Cary left this morning. He was sad to leave us, but looking forward to tying up some loose ends and getting some new deals happening. Hopefully it will be the last time we have an extended absence from each other. I'll miss him. Sami was crying a lot after he left, and very dramatic with it. Nicholas didn't quite understand until he saw Cary get on the plane and then saw the plane leave. He started saying "Daddy..plane..NooNoo (what he calls himself)..plane". A couple of hours later when Cary called us from Sydney before he boarded his international flight, it really hit Nicholas and he started crying a lot and saying what he'd said before. He's asked for Daddy a lot this afternoon. It's been so great that Cary has had a lot of family time this year and has been able to bond so deeply with Nicholas.
When we walked into the airport this morning, I got all excited with the idea of travel. All the places we could go! Ah yeah, I am so not ready to go back to living in a house. I'm going to take some time going through things in the storage shed and really think about if I want to pay to hang on to them, or if they could be easily replaced. I think we'll stay put here for another couple of months so that I can do that without feeling rushed. I'll put some things on ebay, some on consignment and have another garage sale.
I can't stand feeling rushed. There's been a bit of that lately, when we were getting out of the house and getting Cary organised and some other things, and I don't cope well with the stress around those times. I think it's because I am a pretty organised person and when we rush to pack and do things, I am not as thorough and things can get mixed up more easily and then I can't find things and feel like I've forgotten to do something. That's why I need to take some time now and get calm and solid with where I'm at.
Cary proposed a change in our plans recently and I flipped out a bit. A friend asked me "what do YOU want?". It took me several days of pondering this to realise that I often consider Cary and the kids and other people's opinions and needs more than my own. That's changing. I'm starting to not feel guilty about taking time for myself when I want/need to. To just sit down and bask in the sunshine. To think about what I need to do in order to be true to myself and my purpose here. What we are doing is a part of that, I just need to be more in touch with my Self more often during the smaller daily tasks and times as well as when considering major changes.
What Cary proposed is still along the same lines of what we're already doing and planning but maybe going somewhere else instead of the South Pacific next year. And some other business ideas starting right now, and, and, and.... That boy is so busy. Anyway, he has some great ideas and we will start working them in and see how we go. Never a dull moment!
I sorted through the kids clothes too and now all of Sami's clothes fit into the same size container as mine, though somehow she always has more washing than the rest of us. Both boys clothes fit into one the same size as Sami's and mine. I had another 50L plastic container that had toys in it, but the kids are just not playing with them. They are so busy playing with friends and each other and on their scooters and with the birds, that they rarely look for anything else. So I took some toys back to the storage unit and put some others into a smaller container. It turns out that I needed the larger container to put the beach and bath towels in. We had just been leaving them out on a drying rack. They were drying during the day, but as the sun started going down, the afternoon sea spray would get on them and they would get damp. so now I put them away once they are dry.
I had a clever blog written in my head in the middle of the night last night, but now I can't remember any of it. Oh well.
Cary left this morning. He was sad to leave us, but looking forward to tying up some loose ends and getting some new deals happening. Hopefully it will be the last time we have an extended absence from each other. I'll miss him. Sami was crying a lot after he left, and very dramatic with it. Nicholas didn't quite understand until he saw Cary get on the plane and then saw the plane leave. He started saying "Daddy..plane..NooNoo (what he calls himself)..plane". A couple of hours later when Cary called us from Sydney before he boarded his international flight, it really hit Nicholas and he started crying a lot and saying what he'd said before. He's asked for Daddy a lot this afternoon. It's been so great that Cary has had a lot of family time this year and has been able to bond so deeply with Nicholas.
When we walked into the airport this morning, I got all excited with the idea of travel. All the places we could go! Ah yeah, I am so not ready to go back to living in a house. I'm going to take some time going through things in the storage shed and really think about if I want to pay to hang on to them, or if they could be easily replaced. I think we'll stay put here for another couple of months so that I can do that without feeling rushed. I'll put some things on ebay, some on consignment and have another garage sale.
I can't stand feeling rushed. There's been a bit of that lately, when we were getting out of the house and getting Cary organised and some other things, and I don't cope well with the stress around those times. I think it's because I am a pretty organised person and when we rush to pack and do things, I am not as thorough and things can get mixed up more easily and then I can't find things and feel like I've forgotten to do something. That's why I need to take some time now and get calm and solid with where I'm at.
Cary proposed a change in our plans recently and I flipped out a bit. A friend asked me "what do YOU want?". It took me several days of pondering this to realise that I often consider Cary and the kids and other people's opinions and needs more than my own. That's changing. I'm starting to not feel guilty about taking time for myself when I want/need to. To just sit down and bask in the sunshine. To think about what I need to do in order to be true to myself and my purpose here. What we are doing is a part of that, I just need to be more in touch with my Self more often during the smaller daily tasks and times as well as when considering major changes.
What Cary proposed is still along the same lines of what we're already doing and planning but maybe going somewhere else instead of the South Pacific next year. And some other business ideas starting right now, and, and, and.... That boy is so busy. Anyway, he has some great ideas and we will start working them in and see how we go. Never a dull moment!
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